(I have a nice giveaway at the end of this digital issue so stick around to find out what that is)
So maybe this week’s title was on the cryptic side (Don't Let People Lock You In A Cage). Forgive me, I've spent the last week in the mountains in Tenerife, Spain. This is perhaps my enlightened mind speaking. Nonetheless, today’s writing and topic is of crucial importance especially if you are a builder or someone trying to get things off the ground.
Assuming you are a builder, here are some questions to think about and ponder.
Why do you build?
What is your motivation for what you are building?
How do you deal with praise and criticism?
Obsession is just part of the job.
One common trait of anyone I've ever seen build or do something notable is a certain level of obsession with the problem you are trying to solve or a laser eye, persistent focus on the solution you are ideating.
I remember speaking to a tech founder in 2021 who told me that when he was learning to code, a skill that would, later on, be crucial to the development of his app, he would spend 10 hours back to back coding. Watching youtube videos over and over again, he would break to eat and spend time with family but then would be right back to the computer, coding some more after this was done. This level of devotion may seem repulsive and over the top to the average person, however, obsession and devotion are common parlances when we are talking about building things that matter.
There is one danger though, in all the focus and obsession. If you are not careful, it’s very easy to have your identity wrapped up in what you are building and what you are doing. With the praise and maybe even the criticism that comes from people watching you. The comments and titles may start to create an appetite in you for more of what you just heard. You may start to live up to the names and tags people call you. CEO, the boss, the change agent. If you arent careful, when people start to lob these things at you, you may initially bat them away, they may slide off you like water off a duck’s back, however, it only takes a moment for you to begin to take them in. It can feel good for the moment but, after a while, it can do a world of damage. As these titles start to taste sweeter, it’s more tempting to think about yourself and your worth through the prism of what people call you. It may not feel like it but this is a prison and it doesn’t end well.
You are not a brand. You are a person
In the creator market economy, we all live in, it’s hard to talk about each other without wondering what ‘niche’ we fit into and who our ‘audiences are’. All this talk about niches, branding, and speaking to an audience is not healthy for developing a good sense of self whilst building and trying to create something. Our curated feed may have us thinking we are our avatars. We may mistakenly start to think about ourselves as the neat images we have curated online on our social media feeds. This prison strips us of individuality and spontaneity, two crucial ingredients for developing a holistic sense of self.
I remember speaking to a friend who took a great picture during a dinner event and when I asked whether they would post it and they said, 'it doesn’t fit into my feed'. I of course understood what they were saying and whilst there is no great deal wrong with it, it did strike me as particularly sad that we have reached a place in our society where people cant share freely anymore but because they think about themselves as a brand and so have to screen moments to ensure they fit into a neat picture.
Its imperative that builders free themselves from the shackles of branding and ‘telling a story.’ They are prisons that none of us was created to be in.
You are not your mistakes, you make mistakes.
If you are like me, you try to maintain a high standard for yourself. You may fall below that standard from time to time. You should learn from the failure and move on.
I wish this was what happened all the time. Instead of interacting with failure in this way, sometimes I become bedfellows with the failure. Rather than taking failure seriously and learning from it, I take it personally and begin to define myself by the shortcomings in my life. This is not healthy. You are not your mistakes. You made mistakes. Despite how times people wave your mistakes in your face, you don’t have to internalise them. They will give you the necklace to wear, and it’s up to you to reject it. Make it clear to yourself that making mistakes, is a sign that you aren’t living cautiously but you are on the field and are living authentically.
All in all, I want to free ourselves from what we are building. It may be counterintuitive, but we actually become better builders when we aren’t too intimately involved with what we are building.
When we take a step back and see all the little ways people trap us in a prison with their compliments and their criticisms, we ensure we don’t develop an appetite for them.
We build because the world is broken and it needs dreams to try to fix the brokenness. We don’t build for the adulation of people
1. Back on Youtube and Giveaway
It’s been 9 months since my last upload but I'm ready to go. It’s going to go live at 12 pm today and would love you to help me share it.
You can win a customised suit and a fitting from Slaters. It’s going to be free and I make the announcement later today! Let me know what you think.
Subscribe before the video comes out: http://bit.ly/MikeCSYoutube
2. Effective Leadership Masterclass
As you can imagine, this skill is in short supply.
The world is fraught with bad leaders. Leaders who are not accustomed to servanthood but instead confuse leadership with being the boss, the man/woman at the top or simply bellowing orders at others.
I’m hosting a special masterclass for 20 people this month who really want to grow in this skill. A session where you will leave with core leadership skills
London: 23rd of April 2021 (9 am)
Online 24th of April 2021 (6 pm)
3. I spent the last week in Tenerife, Spain on a missionary trip.
So much to say and not enough words. The last week was amazing. I led a group of 9 people on a life-changing 6 day trip to Tenerife. To get an update on all the amazing things that happened, take a look at Our God-Given Mission.